the in between

I hear that it's the in between that really transforms you. Not the easy day to day life. And the pain is where who we really are and what we really believe is tested. But it's the in between changes you. When you have to step out into the unknown. That first step is the one that really changes you. Like when Peter stepped out of the boat, toward a voice asking him to trust (Matthew 14). That letting go of the control you have. The easy everyday life you've come to know so well. I feel like that's where I am. But it looks so familiar here. I know I've been here before. I've heard this faint whisper of the Lord. The begging in His voice to trust him. I'm out of the boat Lord, but I am so much like Peter sometimes. I let the doubt creep in. So quickly I start to sink. Jesus, let me hold onto that sweet voice of reassurance. But more than that, remind me daily of your real character. The coming of Jesus to the disciples out in the storm on the sea. Jesus, that is who you are. You walk out to me. You walk out in rough waters so that I will trust you. You call me to yourself. You tell me not to be afraid. Then you ask me to step out to you. To follow you. You need me to wait in that in between for you. After that first step on that wobbly ground. You want my own world stripped away so that I can really see you. You want full dependence, love, trust, and honor. I have been here before. Learning this same lesson. Lord, let me be thankful for glimpses of you that can only happen when my control is taken away. Jesus, I love your pursuit of your children. Of me. That you walk out to us in a raging storm. And that after all that, the walking on water, the doubting Peter in all of us, that you still calm the storm.

'it's all right,' he said, 'i am here! don't be afraid.' mark 6:50